WHEEEE!!!

There is always a rainbow after a thunderstorm.

Somehow, that saying doesn't seem to really apply to real life huh. So I guess it's those random fairy tale happily ever after endings which never do happen. And here I am, stuck in kindergarten, wishing that things would just go back to normal. But then again, what is normal. Back to what we were before, pretending to lead a happily life when some of us are just crying inside? For what, to make everyone know that we are normal and a bunch of happily ever after fairytale characters?

Words said never made such an impact onto me. Sentences just keep repeating and repeating over in my head and no matter how hard I try to fight it off, it just doesn't seem to be working. It just chants over and over again in my brain, and it makes me think and think and think, it makes me feel as if I have been wasting my time all this while.

And I know I haven't been the bestfriend to you for these past few days. And yes I mean you, and you know who you are. I thought it was easy to stay in the centre, being on good terms with both sides but it's not as simple as I think. I guess my human nature just makes me drift off course again, and I seem to underestimate my feelings. I always thought I could manage to keep a clear head, no matter what the scenario, take a step back, see the big picture. But at times like this I feel like a little kid, unsure or anything to do at all. But yet, at times where I'm alone, I manage to see the big picture. Subconsciously, I remember how you stood up for me, sacrificed for me and all that I can do is just this. And I feel really lousy. It might be too late to do anything now, I don't know. But at least there would be pretty memories that I can take with me.

And now, all that I can do is just to pray that things would work out, somehow.

Jesus, take the wheel
Take it from my hands
Cause I can't do this on my own
I'm letting go

So give me one more chance
To save me from this road I'm on
Jesus, take the wheel

Labels: Emotions, Reflections